I tried to get a job as a writer but nobody wanted my skills in writing a suicide letter. What does a suicide letter even look like? What if they do it with lipstick on the dinner table? Suicide message? Do you think anyone ever draws a picture? Do people keep suicide letters? How come they don’t make a museum of famous suicide letters? Are they really letters? Or are they just notes?  

I’m in the process of writing my own suicide letter. Well actually mine is called a latter which means you read it later{Thats fucking stupid }

Orphan joke

I have no interest in spreading my orphan genes as a good orphan does___Actually, even if I had a kid, am I obligated to give it to an orphanage? Omg, is this the fine print? Because technically, the only way to produce an orphan is by…And that's when me and my son teamed up to murder parents, producing orphans left and right or so I thought. What actually happened is that, I said that all out loud in the hospital and they wouldn’t let me leave with the child. And now I have a warrant for my arrest in the state of Georgia…for the second time.

There’s only one way to spread orphanisom… Yes, I’m racist. I believe that orphans are inherently superior. We call ourselves the PP__Pan’s Protege’s and we do orphan things.